"Shoes!"
"Huh?"
"You need to take off your shoes."
"Oh..right."
As I walked through the metal detector, I stiffened. Hopefully I'm in the clear, I thought. Funny thing was, I already knew I was in the clear. I wasn't even wearing earrings.
"Natalie, honey go stand by Peter and Erik. When Its your turn, just walk through... okay?"
"Okay Mommy."
As fast as I my short, fat, three year-old legs could stretch, I quickly made my way over to where my brothers were standing.
"No look! The Green Ninja Fighter is better...he has a sword!"
"Nuh uh the Red one is! Hes got a bowling ball you can throw at the bad guys!"
"Oh I like that...gimme!"
As Peter and Erik fought over which Ninja action figure was better, I silently stood in line, sucking my thumb and watching each giant walk through the tunnel of doom. Or at least what I thought was the tunnel of doom.
That is also a good beginning. It is maybe a little bit better than the other one because it is really about YOU. I like the dialouge you use. I just don´t understand that with the Gree Ninja Fighter, but maybe I am just too stupid for that =)
ReplyDeleteButI think you have a very good language, I like the gerunds =)
keep writing!
i think both beginings are good.
ReplyDeletei think this is a great start!
you show very well and alot more than my telling.
i like the list idea you have for your stuff you take on the plane.